I learned from what happened last week. I had high expectation, was almost gone crazy from waiting for a download link, and three days later when I finally got it, I basically went berserk. Okay not really but I couldn't control myself, there were just so much excitement and emotions. I was shaking, crying, laughing over the episode. I was shaking so bad I didn't dare to play it again to pick my favorite moments, quotes, looks, etc like I normally do when I like an episode of any tv shows. This time I just couldn't. I tried to calm myself and force myself to sleep but again, I couldn't sleep. My heart and head were pounding thinking of it.

It wasn't even particularly a good episode, I don't know what had gotten into me at that time. I guess torturing myself with spoilers, discussion posts, and recaps for three days has its own side effects on me. Also, looking at pretty Sharon "Shocker" was shocking indeed. I was pleasantly surprised with how well she does pretty girl drag. She did it two times in this episode; as skinny blond Sharon "Shocker" and as a pretty ginger on the runway, both are stunningly beautiful. If you look at it, she's one of the most distinctive makeovers when it comes to boy to girl transformation. She just look so different.

And the Untucked. There were almost too much yelling, too many emotions and I just couldn't handle it. I am so easily emotionally affected by any smallest thing, so it was too much for me to handle. The next days when I was calmer I repeat the video message from Alaska part so many times, it was so cute/funny.

This week though, I was not letting myself to have the high expectation that a download link will soon appear. But surprise! There is one posted just 2 hours after the episode was up on Logo website. I was excited! I went home and download it, believing that if a dl link for an episode is up, so is one for untucked. But I was proven wrong and I half heartedly accept the fact and remind myself to feel grateful that I could watch the episode even without the untucked.

This episode is somewhat underwhelming. I can't decide whether that ... or was I trying too hard to not like the episode. I don't really like the challenge, I don't like the Phi Phi/Sharon building up the drama edit, I don't like my bb Sharon getting shit on by Phi Phi. Yes, I'm being overprotective of someone that isn't mine and doesn't even know I exist. And yes, I chose to believe what a tv production showed me no matter how it was just a fragment of the whole picture and I am aware that it was edited heavily to emphasize certain things they want us to believe. I don't like Sharon's runway look. It is different and I applaud her for being able to show different range of drag on stage, but her look last night was just not my cup of tea. I'm torn between feeling disappointed or grateful that Untucked download link wasn't there when I was home. I know Untucked will be too much to handle (I hate when people yells!), so it's kind of good to watch it separately later when I'm less excited and high from the main episode.