Yesterday I argued with a kid in the morning and I was left feeling uneasy all day. The whole my online life, I've argued with people from the internet a lot of times, and still it's not a fun thing to do. I'm the phlegmatic type who wouldn't speak up to avoid confrontation until it really really bugs me. This time it did.

I don't really want to explain the negative stuff but in short, Sharon Needles, the drag artist that I support, was accused of racism from her use of N-word (and swastika?) during performance. I'm not interested in racism, I don't engage in conversation about that and I live and grew up in a country in with TOTALLY different background of slavery or racism. We consists of a lot of ethnicity and we were all colonized by Europeans in the past. We are not sensitive in recognizing derogatory terms that is used in white cultures, the white culture we know is the ones being shown in movies or tv. Racism exist in my country in a whole different form, many people aren't aware of and or educated enough about racism that occurred in the US. We just live in a totally different culture.

I don't pay attention to the negativity towards Sharon that is spreading everywhere. The main point is, I believe that Sharon isn't a racist and I'm going to continue supporting her with what I can do. One of them being, posting fun stuff to the fansite on tumblr, fysn.

On the other side of the world, there's this kid who is the biggest fan of Sharon who is also one of the co-mods of the fan blog. He went all the way to the US to meet his idol and had an awesome time with her. And being a 16 year old kid (if that bio is true), he doesn't seem to think things through before making any action. He continuously reblogging negative stuff about Sharon hate or messages towards the haters when the blog is supposed to be about the fans. I get it, he wants people to believe that his idol is a good person who is not a racist, and he thinks addressing the problem on the fanblog is a good way, but I think that is just the wrong step to make. Why address the haters on a FANblog? Genuine fans who don't know about the matter now are bothered by the posts and fact that many people hates Sharon. I was bothered. If he hadn't brought it up, I wouldn't even notice that there's a blog dedicated to anything that is against Sharon Needles. I hate hate or any form of negativity, stop spreading it!

I had enough. I told him he needs to stop. I told him that haters will exist no matter what we do, why not focusing on the love rather than the hate? Let's get back to being the fun fansite that we were before. He didn't get it. He said that I was 'totally wrong' and that I need to stop. Well, look at that. He wouldn't even listen or think or change his mind about the matter after my logical explanation, which only proves my point about the haters; people won't change their mind no matter what we say or do. People believes what the want to believe.

He even shut the blog down (though temporarily), which I still don't get the point until now. Shutting the FANblog down to stop the haters from accusing that Sharon is a racist?? It doesn't make any sense. What about the fans who believed that Sharon isn't a racist?

Since he told me to stop, I fully realized that from that moment on, what I say or do would not solve any problem so I stopped. A while after that, it came to me ... the gravity of it all. I read more articles and comments on an incident that happened the night before, and finally I understand why people were upset. I have 9 entries of Sharon Needles in my google alert today, and most of them are about that very incident in Atlanta. See, this is one of the times when fandoms are no longer fun. It's all serious business up in here and I could only wish for the simpler old days when we actually enjoy being in a fandom idolizing someone.

And now I am kicked off the blog, which also doesn't make any sense. Why making enemies with fellow fans? An active and fully supporting fan who volunteered to help on maintaining the fanblog nonetheless?